I used to tense up when I was told I ‘looked better’. I was proud of my disguise, but I also felt a strange sort of disconnect between the girl on the outside and what I was trying to understand about the inside of me. I had this sick belief that I deserved to have […]
Tag: eating disorder recovery
In the Waiting.
Over the course of this year, my entire life has been shaken up more times than I can count. I feel almost dizzy, my head is spinning still, even in the moments of peace. Residual sea sickness. Throwing up on the pavement. Regardless, I feel the tiniest sparkle of excitement. The Holy Spirit is speaking […]
Let me preface this with the context that this writing is therapy homework. A blog post and homework all in one. Brilliant. I mean, if you have to kill two birds, you may well use one stone. I call it genius, others probably call it lazy. (off topic, but I don’t support the killing of […]
I’m Talking to Me. (or, a hypocrite speaks)
Sometimes I want to be together, I want to sound intelligent, well researched. I want to everything to progress through a series of steps until it reaches a conclusion, my life to be like a well-formed essay. Sometimes I think I just need honesty. I am a mess. Like completely. I can’t think of a single […]
In year 11 and 12 I did top level English. It was an interesting experience for all involved in my education. I was a bit of a mess at that point in my life and had sub-zero confidence in my ability to have an actual opinion on anything. Despite this, one of the most important […]